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Writer's pictureCristina Rusu

To dye or not to dye, that is the question

I started dyeing my hair at a young age, or at least what I consider to be a young age. I think I was around 17 and my hairdresser at the time told me I would look really good with blond and red highlights in my hair. Luckily for me, my mom was all on board with me getting blond highlights. We stuck to blond so my dad wouldn't notice the change in my hair colour.


My natural hair colour is a light brown, chestnut colour. As a child up until maybe 4 or 5, I was extremely blond. So, my mom and I hatched a well-laid plan. We bought bleach, waited till my dad was fast asleep and hid in the bathroom to bleach my hair. We did only some highlights on the top of my head so that I could hide it in a ponytail if need be.


If anyone has bleached their hair before, you know it stinks. You cannot hide that penetrating smell very well. But, we already had an answer ready. My mom dyed her hair. Suspicion would be averted. I enjoyed it. Perhaps less about the bleaching and getting highlights, then the fact that my mom and I had bonded over it. We had so much fun and laughter.


Obviously, the entire subterfuge was a waste of our time. As it was summer, my newly bleached highlights went even blonder and you could see the difference in my hair. No way I could get out of this one. Coincidently, my dad actually saw me with my hair down and curious, asked if I had dyed it. I lied through my teeth. Looking back at it now, I think my dad wouldn't have minded. He probably would have just shaken his head and left my mom and me to our own devices. I think my brother was more appalled about my bleached tresses than my dad. Who would have thought?!


In the end, the hair colour I really wanted, was Nicole Kidman's in Practical Magic. Practical Magic was and still is my number 1 favourite movie of all times. It has everything it needs for a cosy autumn movie. It has witches, curses, and a love story. What else do you need?! It is only loosely based on Alice Hoffmann`s novel of the same title. I must admit, I enjoyed the movie more, it has a feel-good vibe to it. If you haven't seen it, well what are you waiting for?!


I think I came pretty near to her colour, right?!


Once I turned 19 I began to regularly dye my hair. I went from Mahagony to Strawberry to Auburn to Riviera to Mango and Rose Gold. I used them all. L'Oreal Paris, Garnier, Schwarzkopf and many more. I kinda lost count at how many different brands and different shades of red I used. In 15 years of constantly colouring my hair, I think it is understandable to lose count on the different shades and brands I used.


About 7 years ago, I noticed more and more white strands, especially at the top of my head. As I never dyed my hair to cover white hair (nothing wrong with doing that by the way), I decided to embrace my whites and go completely white. So, I went to my hairdresser and told her what I wanted. Not sure if people remember, but there was a bit of a craze going on in the UK with grey/silver/platinum hair.


To go from dyed hair to the colour I wanted (see below for pics of me with a silver-coloured wig) she would have needed to strip all my colour back, bleached me a number of times and then dyed my hair the silver or platinum colour I wanted. As my hair is very fine and was already damaged by 15 years of dyeing she did warn me I could lose a lot of my hair, or damage it badly. I decided against going grey/white/silver/platinum and continued dyeing my hair different shades of red.

Fast forward to last year. My whites were coming in at a rapid pace, and no matter what the box dye says, 99% grey coverage, it didn't cover them, at all. I also had to start and increase the frequency of dyeing my hair, as you could see the greys being persistent and difficult. So every 2 weeks I had to dye my hair, my hair became more brittle and the dye started to burn my scalp. Even though I had used the same one for years.


I think my body was finally telling me it had enough. To be honest with you, I had enough as well. Of spending every month 12 pounds on box dye, of spending 30 minutes blind as a bat with a stinking and stinging hair dye on my head that burned my scalp and made me itch, and that only covered my greys for maybe 1 week. Enough is enough.


So a year ago I made the decision of going grey, or at least of letting my natural hair colour grow out. If at one point or another I hated my natural hair I could always start dyeing it again. I also knew that growing it out from the length I had it would drive me absolutely insane, so I went for a pixie cut. The following two pictures are 2 months apart.

Going grey wasn't an easy decision. I still at times want to run and get a box dye and colour my hair, any colour, just not whatever it is now. Caring for grey hair is also a bit more time-consuming. I am using a plethora of products for grey hair. Grey hair tends to be wirier so it needs more conditioner, but I have fine hair so I technically should avoid conditioner as it weighs my hair down. I have now amassed a collection of different hair products, for fine hair but mostly for grey hair. I find that they all work well, and my hair is softer and has a bit more oomph to it as well. See below a list of hair products.

The shampoo removes any brassiness in the white, as white hair can go discoloured (go figure), the Pantene one is a hair mask called Grey and Illuminating, again bringing out the grey. The Kerastase is a new product I bought it smells absolutely divine and it is a leave-in conditioner, it has built-in heat protection and UV protection. So it is an all-in-one product. And the last one is a must for all fine-haired ladies. It has a beautiful smell and gives volume to tired-looking fine hair.


A quick disclaimer as well, I don't receive any revenue from these brands. I just like using them and I see a difference in my hair. Especially using the leave-in conditioner. The white hairs are much tamer and my hair so much softer.


Going grey is a personal choice, and the first 3 to 5 months I found the hardest. What helped me through are the stories I read on social media i.e. Instagram on these two handlers @grombre and @silversistersinternational


Those stories and pictures of ladies with grey hair or greying hair have inspired me to keep going. In two months time, if we are finally allowed out of this lockdown, the last of my dye will be cut out and I will be left with all-natural hair colour. So if you find yourself despairing at white hairs that have started to show and you can't do anything about them, why not embrace them for a while?! Who knows, you might learn to like them. And if not, you can always dye them back to whatever colour you want.


I think I am keeping mine. I don't believe that grey hair is a sign of age, it's just nature's way of adding stardust in our hair. Growing old is a privilege denied to many, so let's celebrate it.


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